Megan Fox covers GQ this month where she talks about not wanting to be famous, how she feels about Miley Cyrus and Vanessa Hudgens, her little lesbian fling with a hot Russian stripper… wait stripper what?!? Megan says,

Well, that year my boyfriend broke up with me, and I decided - oh man; sorry, Mommy! - that I was in love with this girl that worked at the Body Shop [a strip club on Sunset Boulevard]. I decided that I was going to get her to love me back, and I went out of my way to create a relationship with this girl, a stripper named Nikita. I was there all the time - I would go there by myself. I bought her things - perfume, body spray, girlie stuff. I turned into a weird middle-aged married man. I felt like I had this need to save Nikita. I’d get lap dances so I could get to know her, and I’d give her what I thought were great little sound bites of inspiration - like ‘You can do it, you’re better than this! I didn’t want her to be there. She was sort of a tough badass, but she’d do these beautiful slow dances to Aerosmith ballads. She had really long stick-straight hair and was Russian. I just liked her. She was really sadistic and sarcastic and funny.

But, Megan says she’s not a lesbo.

I don’t want it to come off as a Lindsay Lohan vibe. You know? Look, I’m not a lesbian - I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes. I mean, I could see myself in a relationship with a girl - Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She’s mesmerizing. And lately I’ve been obsessed with Jenna Jameson, but.… Oh boy.

If you looked up denial in a dictionary, you would find a giant picture of Megan Fox, kinda like the one above, hot with her tongue sticking out, ready to get it on with a porn star. Quick! Grab a camera.