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    Ellie Kam

John Mayer Gets Racist

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John Mayer reportedly pulled an oh-no-he-didn’t last week at The Slipper room in New York, when he jumped up on stage and made a few racist remarks to comedian Kumail Nanjiani.

According to sources at the show, John decided to exercise his funny skills the other night, so he convinced the show’s host Seth Herzog to allow him to do a 5-minute-long routine. He decided however, to stay on stage for 20 minutes, which cut into real comedian Kumail’s stage time. When he finally left the stage, Kumail went on to perform, but this apparently annoyed John, so John decided to crash the stage during the middle of Kumail’s performance, and start spewing racist jokes to the Pakistani comedian.

John reportedly called Kumail “Kabul”, and then went on to tell him that he “looked like a brown guy but sounded like a white guy”.

John finally issued a John-Mayer-style apology over the weekend, saying,

I don’t know how to do it yet. I don’t know how to bomb. It was combative in the sense that the crowd didn’t really accept the fact that the jock, the guy who gets the girls, was at a place where the guys go who talk about how they don’t get the girls.

John humbly added that he personally apologized to Kumail after the show, and that Kumail accepted.

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Brittany Murphy Thinks She Heard Gunshots

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Brittany Murphy called the cops at 2:30 this morning, wailing uncontrollably about hearing gunshots fired outside of her Hollywood home.

When the cops showed up, they found Brittany - standing on her balcony, having a screaming meltdown. What they didn’t find was a gun, bullets, body, or anything having to do with gun fire. They concluded that the noise probably came from a nearby generator. Brittany was then sent back to bed.

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Apparently Lindsay Lohan had a bad weekend because she took Beyonce’s dressing room backstage at Singapore’s F1 Rocks, but was told to leave when Beyonce arrived on Saturday.

Lindsay, who was hosting the event, reportedly asked for the biggest dressing room, but was assigned to a smaller one instead. Rather than taking it like a man, she decided to ignore the assignment, and make herself at home in Beyonce’s room. Beyonce later showed up with her 70-man security team to kick Lindsay out. Lindsay was reportedly very upset over the situation, telling reporters,

I’ve been a bit down. It was a strange night. Everyone was being aggressive and bothering me. I really didn’t like it.

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Kanye West Apologizes, Then Changes His Mind

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The moment after Kanye West skipped up on stage to give props to Beyonce during Taylor Swift’s VMA acceptance speech, he woke up and realized that his little antic made him seem like much less of a genius to the few fans that he still had left. In an effort to restore his geniusness, Kanye decided to post an all-caps bulletin on his blog, apologizing for his stupidity. Kanye wrote,

I’M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD’VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE’S IN THE BLEACHERS! …………………… I’M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!…………….. BEYONCE’S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I’M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN’ THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE … WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I’M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME… THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I’M NOT CRAZY YALL, I’M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I’M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!

Kanye’s bright moment passed quickly, however, and he later removed the apology from his blog.

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The best thing about dating Jon Gosselin? He earns so much money from his kids that you’ll never have to work again. Kate Major took advantage of the perk today when she reportedly resigned from her position as Senior Reporter for Star Magazine.

The mag confirmed Kate’s departure, saying that she cited “conflict of interest between her reporting duties for the magazine and her relationship with Jon Gosselin” as her reason for leaving.

What Kate evidently didn’t count on was the fact that Jon the playa would probably move on from her in a couple of weeks, leaving her broke, alone, and unemployed.

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Jamie Foxx Pisses Off Rihanna

It looks like our favorite always-appropriate actor Jamie Foxx is trying to make celebrity friends again. While onstage at a party at Tao in Las Vegas last weekend, Jamie spotted Rihanna in the crowd and called her up to duet with him. When she declined, he proceeded to badger her while the DJ began playing her hit Umbrella. Rihanna, clearly peeved, stayed for the entire song at Jamie’s request - and pretended to awkwardly enjoy herself. According to witnesses, she stomped angrily out of the club immediately after.

Jamie’s no stranger to pissing people off. He was forced to issue a public apology back in April after making fun of Miley Cyrus during a radio interview.

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Melissa Joan Hart was apparently very worried about the health of cancer-stricken actress Farrah Fawcett last week, but not for the usual nice-people reasons.

The former teenage witch was overheard last Friday, quietly telling people at KTLA in Los Angeles that she was afraid that if the ailing actress died before the end of this week, People Magazine would opt to replace her own hot bikini cover with a story of Farrah’s death.

Luckily, Farrah is still holding on right now. As of today, Melissa and her sexy body/not-so-sexy personality are still gracing the cover of People mag.

Update: Melissa has issued a non-apology for her comments on her MySpace by trying to (unsuccessfully) explain herself. The witch with a B wrote:

I was merely explaining what I had read about how the cover of People magazine was chosen from an article last week I read in the Times.

Huh?

Full cover after the jump.

Continue Reading…

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Yesterday, we reported that Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were so miserable on the jungle set of I’m a Celebrity that they almost walked out on the show until an NBC exec was able to convince them to stay.

Well today, a source close to the production is reporting that after being forced to eat rat tails and getting accused of hitting other cast members yesterday, the pair have finally quit the charitable show for real.

Day two of I’m a Celebrity airs tonight - without the gruesome twosome.

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Asher Roth Disses Lindsay Lohan

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Lindsay Lohan is a big fan of Asher Roth, but it looks like Asher isn’t too excited about returning the love.  Lindsay was spotted at Asher’s show at USC Santa Barbara the other day, attempting to convince the rapper to allow her to dance onstage like an idiot with him during his song She Don’t Want a Man.  Asher reportedly turned her down, and even skipped playing the single altogether, just to be safe.

Linds took to her Twitter after the show to rant about the snub, saying, “Wow. Asher was cocky to all my friends and not that nice.”

The actress reportedly drove a whole 3 hours from L.A. just to get her ego beat.

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Ben Silverman, who RUNS NBC threw together this video with actor Fisher Stevens, who’s playing that harmonica. The pair were supposedly at the 2008 Aspen Youth Experience celebrity ski event when they decided to strip down and allow Rob Morrow to video tape them acting like retards.

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It looks like Spencer Pratt’s having a great time smearing himself all over the news these days.  Penishead recently spoke out about his undying love for The Hills, his plans on running for public office, and how much he enjoys looking like a giant douche.  Here are some of our favorite quotes:

On being a big douche: Honestly, I have more fun smiling for the cameras with Heidi in cheesy situations than I do with pretty much anything else. But you know what I said to Heidi? People started taking it for granted. We don’t want to abuse it. It’s too special to me.

On his plans to ruin America: Don’t know if I’ll be getting elected any time in the next century or so. But definitely going after Mayor of LA and at least Governor, but I’ll prob stop at Governor. I mean if people were really pushing for me [to run for President] at that point, I’ll probably have to step into that role.

On the total awesomeness of The Hills:
The Hills is the greatest blessing in my life and I know Heidi’s life. The Hills is so much fun. It’s so cool. [I'll keep doing it] until I’m 90 with a cane and a walker.

If you haven’t combusted yet, feel free to check out more from that interview here.

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Last night’s South Park episode took some shots at Kanye West and his out of control ego.  The show apparently bothered Kanye so much that he actually took the effort to push down the caps lock key, and write a blog to announce his decision to work on shrinking the size of his enormous head.

The blog post reads:

SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT’S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER. I USE TO USE IT TO BUILD UP MY ESTEEM WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN ME. NOW THAT PEOPLE DO BELIEVE AND SUPPORT MY MUSIC AND PRODUCTS THE BEST RESPONSE IS THANK YOU INSTEAD OF “I TOLD YOU SO!!!” IT’S COOL TO TALK SHIT WHEN YOU’RE RAPPING BUT NOT IN REAL LIFE. WHEN YOU MEET LITTLE WAYNE IN PERSON HE’S THE NICEST GUY FOR EXAMPLE. I JUST WANNA BE A DOPER PERSON WHICH STARTS WITH ME NOT ALWAYS TELLING PEOPLE HOW DOPE I THINK I AM. I NEED TO JUST GET PAST MYSELF. DROP THE BRAVADO AND JUST MAKE DOPE PRODUCT. EVERYTHING IS NOT THAT SERIOUS. AS LONG AS PEOPLE THINK I ACT LIKE A BITCH THIS TYPE OF SHIT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. I GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME TO MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE I’M NOT ACTUALLY A HUGE DOUCHE BUT I’M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE. I’M SURE THE WRITERS AT SOUTH PARK ARE REALLY NICE PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE. THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO DRAW MY CREW. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY ALSO!! I’M SURE THERE’S GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THIS… THAT’S HOW YOU KNOW IT’S ME!

HOLY CAPS LOCK, BATMAN!  Kanye admits his grammar skills suck balls.

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The Fawcett/O’Neal family is making big headlines this week with some ‘can’t make this up’ news - and yes, it’s only Monday.

Farrah, who was previously rumored to be dying from ANAL CANCER which she was diagnosed with in 2006, is reportedly not near death, but was hospitalized after receiving an experimental stem-cell treatment in Germany.

Meanwhile, her son, dumbass Redmond O’Neal was arrested over the weekend for bringing narcotics into a prison facility, and earning some extra honesty points by telling security officers about his possessions.

The LA sheriff’s department reports that Redmond was visiting a friend in a prison on Sunday, when he told security officers in the jail parking lot that he had drugs in his car.  Cops found Heroin and Xanax in Redmond’s vehicle, and took him into custody.  His bail was set at $25,000, and he’ll be required to appear in court on Wednesday to face his new charges.

As you may recall, Redmond was arrested last September, along with his father Ryan after crystal meth was found in their home.  Redmond is currently on probation for that charge, which he pleaded guilty for earlier this year.

We’ve made a nifty Redmond O’Neal mugshot compilation above, for your viewing displeasure.

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Joe Jonas Pulls A Miley Cyrus

It seems Joe Jonas didn’t learn anything from Miley Cyrus’ Asian mocking photo. The snap above, leaked by the Huffington Post, shows Middle Jonas exposing his edgy side. You gotta give him credit though, he’s still doing the role model thing by keeping his purity ring in plain sight.

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Pete Wentz Ain’t Gonna Grow Up

Pete Wentz may have gotten married and had a kid, but that apparently hasn’t stopped him from having some piss roulette fun.

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