Apparently Tom Cruise is the only person that can successfully shut Katie Holmes up. According to several sources at an NYC New Moon screening on Saturday, Katie showed up in the theater with two friends, and proceeded to talk loudly throughout the entire movie. One witness said,

Katie talked through all of ‘New Moon.’ It was unbelievable – they talked nonstop about the movie and everything else. Some people wanted to tell them to be quiet, but when they realized who it was, they stayed silent. No one wanted to shush Katie.

Katie left the theater after the screening, completely unaware that she had ruined the entire film for dozens of annoying little girls.

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Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise were spotted attending a massive Scientology party, celebrating the 25th aniversary of the International Association of Scientologiests, with their daughter Suri in England last Friday.

Sources say that when a choir took the stage, Tom began swaying back and forth to the music like an idiot. Katie looked bored, and tried to clap her hands, but was way off beat. Tom made a short speech to the crowd, and later was overheard bitching about Scientology protesters to another man at the event.

About 4,000 people were present at the event. Other celebs that made the trip included John Travolta, and his wife Kelly Preston.

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Looks like the Cruises were unable to find a suitable Scientology school in Boston for their spawn. Katie Holmes was spotted in recent weeks, dropping her little alien, Suri Cruise off at the Yawkey Center For Early Education And Learning in Boston, MA. The school is run by the Catholic Charities of Boston.

According to several sources, Katie, who was raised Catholic, wanted Suri to have a similar upbringing. Tom was supposedly be against the idea. No word yet on how Katie was able to win that fight.

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According to the Daily Mail, The Church of Scientology is drawing a little inspiration from Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes for their latest uniform designs.

The vampire-like threads are supposedly just giant black capes with red lining, and skirts or pants underneath. All of the designs have reportedly been approved by Tom, Katie, and church leader David Miscavige.

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Tom Cruise is losing that grip on the wife. Word on the street says that Katie Holmes is stepping out of the house again for work. This time, she’s launching her own celebrity clothing line with her stylist Jeanne Yang, who created her Tropic Thunder premiere dress with her last year.

The range will consist of high-end women’s wear and some children’s clothing inspired by Suri.

Katie’s rep confirmed the other day that the line will be going up for sale at Maxfield this coming fall.

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Not only did Tom Cruise allow Katie Holmes out of her Scientoloprison to perform on the 100th episode of So You Think You Can Dance, he even let other men touch her during her routine! Check out the scandalous performance, above.

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Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise’s little precious gift from Xenu, Suri is turning 3 later this month, and it seems her parents have decided that she’s just about ready to begin those Scientology audits. Tom has reportedly enrolled Suri in classes at Will Smith’s school, New Village Leadership Academy in LA.  The school claims to be secular, but is rumored to be a breeding ground for little Scientolospawn.

The school will set TomKat back $8,810 per year, has a no-sugar policy (those poor children), and uses a Scientology-based learning method called Study Technology.

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Katie Holmes recently sat down with Glamour magazine to dish about her career, her marriage to Tom Cruise, and her experience being mom to one of the most made fun of children in Hollywood. Apparently she wants us to stop calling Suri an alien, it hurts her feelings.  Read what else Katie has to say, here.

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Miu Miu has released their latest ad featuring Katie Holmes, and we couldn’t help but notice how awesomely warm she looks roasting on that fire pit. It’s so cold here in NY we wish we could join her.

Actual pic below.

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Is Katie Holmes possessed by Xenu? Yes.

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I knew that Tom Cruise was up to something. Here are some photos from Katie Holmes’ new Miu Miu ads. What do you think Katie will look like after 10 more years with the psycholunastic Scientologist?

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Today just happens to be Christina Aguilera, Brad Pitt, and Katie Holmes’ birthdays.  And probably like a lot more people in the world’s birthdays too. Yay happy birthday!

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We’ve got more from Tom and Katie’s NY Times Magazine interview.  We especially liked this quote from Tom:

As a young girl, Kate said she dreamed of marrying me. And I said I wouldn’t want to disappoint her.

It’s like a fairy princess story!

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Tom Cruise and his zombie wife, Katie Holmes get dark for this Sunday’s edition of the New York Times Magazine.  In it, Katie tries to convince the world that she’s not wearing Tom’s mind control cap.  She says,

There’s a misperception about me that I just became this wallflower, this woman who doesn’t have any control of her life. And that’s pretty wrong. From the very beginning, I’ve made choices in my life that have been very strong.

She has no examples of those choices as of yet, but Tom tries to help by saying,

At one point, I thought she was going to ask me to marry her first and I put her off by changing the subject. I wanted to ask her.

Katie thought she had escaped the zombie forcefield, but was reeled in at the last minute when Tom confused her by “changing the subject.”  Nice work Tom.  Where can I get one of these cool brain scrambling devices?  I want a candy store.

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Details magazine has listed Tom Cruise as the 7th most influential man under 47. Somehow though, he managed to snag the cover spot. The magazine says about Tom,

There’s always something sinister lurking behind his sunny demeanor, absurd good looks, and, most of all, his aggressive sincerity. But there’s no denying he’s the most quintessentially all-American movie star since John Wayne.

The sinister part? Yeah, that’s the devil trying to make its way out of Tom’s eyes. Stay far away from that man if you value your life.

In other Tom Cruise news, our favorite evil influential man recently spoke with UK’s Mirror to give a little more personal info on who else? But himself! In it, he says that he and Katie will probably have more kids when she finishes her stint on Broadway, he wants Suri to get used to all the paparazzi attention and just see it as a normal part of life, and he’s kind of regretting that Oprah couch jumping incident. Really? Cause I thought that was sooo cool!

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